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This weekend, many very important people (Drake, et. al.) are going to be walking around Toronto and looking at tall people throw round bouncies at taller baskets and I guess it is kind of a big deal. (JK, I know how basketball works. I for sure played it once in the seventh grade.)
And while I have been studying up on what to say if I encounter a basketball player out and about in Toronto, it is pretty unlikely that I will get to any of the main– or not at all main–events. To celebrate the very first time this heightened event has been held outside of the US, you could:
1. Spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars on StubHub to secure a ticket to the main event.
OR if you can’t afford that/don’t care/don’t have cable/live far away from the Air Canada Centre
2. You can get the FULL NBA All Star experience* by watching some of the greatest cinematic masterpieces** known to man.
*possible exaggeration
**that are about basketball
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White Men Can’t Jump
Come to see Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes get all sweaty on the courts, stay for the yo’ mamma jokes and trash talk. Seriously, this movie is a treasure trove of insults. With gems like, Yo, pretty boy! I looked up basketball player in the dictionary and it said ‘Not you!’ it will be just like you’re sitting courtside with Drake’s arm around your shoulder.
For real though, Isn’t Woody Harrelson the best? The answer is obviously yes. He is.
