By:\u00a0Anne T. Donahue<\/p>\n
If Instagram has taught us anything, it\u2019s that everybody but you and I are having the greatest summers of all time. People are outside. People are on beaches. (I don\u2019t like the beach, but I don\u2019t know your life, so why would I assume you feel the same.) People are in different countries, doing different things. People are eating salads they seem to have made on their own time. I have seen at least 14 types of sandals; I have seen not a single sweater. Summer is in full bloom, baby, and you\u2019ve got roughly a month left to enjoy it.<\/p>\n
So I have made you a list. Because summer is nothing if not a chance to fear everything you\u2019re missing out on, or that you\u2019re running out of time so quickly that you are absolute seconds from the doom and gloom of February, the saddest and most terrible month of the year. Remember: these are all the things you have to do to ensure that summer 2019 was indeed the Best Summer Ever™.<\/p>\n
Wear shorts<\/strong> Eat ice cream<\/strong> Eat and\/or drink root beer floats<\/strong> Listen to music you associate with summer, and only<\/em> music you associate with summer<\/strong> Pet a dog<\/strong> Sit outside<\/strong> Go to a cottage<\/strong> Sit on a patio<\/strong> Complain about summer<\/strong> By:\u00a0Anne T. Donahue If Instagram has taught us anything, it\u2019s that everybody but you and I are having the greatest summers of all time. People are outside. People are on beaches. (I don\u2019t like the beach, but I don\u2019t know your life, so why would I assume you feel the same.) People are in different […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":67426,"featured_media":117458,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[64591],"tags":[83613,65171,83292,81720],"class_list":["post-117457","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-wellness","tag-anne-t-donahue-musings","tag-summer","tag-top-story","tag-topstory"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n
\nStart small, but start mighty. Try it once. Photograph it as proof of participation. Pair them with a sandal or running shoe. Take a risk. Wear a t-shirt. Try on a tank top. Then, after realizing that your thighs are sticking to every surface you sit on for more than 24 seconds (respectively), take them off, throw them in the laundry, fold them and place them in your close until next year. Because you did it, and you did it well.<\/p>\n
\nOr sorbet or frozen yogurt or whatever you can consume to evoke the magic of feeling like a child for a fleeting, blessed second. Preferably for dinner, which I did last night and do not regret even slightly.<\/p>\n
\nWhich, I will add, also make for a delicious lunch.<\/p>\n
\nAnd listen to it loudly. It isn\u2019t your fault that your neighbours don\u2019t share the same affinity you do for Steely Dan. Sorry that everybody in traffic is vehemently opposed to Shania Twain, circa 1995. Don\u2019t blame me for not having the musical taste necessary to plunge into Yacht Rock. You\u2019re the DJ of your own life. Refuse to take outside requests.<\/p>\n
\nPeople really seem to be into dogs. They seem okay, but anyone who really loves them doesn\u2019t know the true joy of a cat who truly hates you finally letting you hold them like a baby. So: pet a dog and then throw that shit on Instagram. You did it. You were a part of something. Somewhere, a cat is rolling its eyes.<\/p>\n
\nIt doesn\u2019t really matter what you do, just try it on for size. Work outside. Eat outside. Sit on the steps of your front stoop, watching your neighbours with the intensity of a wheelchair-bound Jimmy Stewart in Rear Window<\/em>. Look up at the sky every so often to confirm you\u2019re not inside. Tell everybody you\u2019ve ever met that you\u2019re outdoorsy now.<\/p>\n
\nYou don\u2019t have to own it. It doesn\u2019t even need to belong to anybody you know. Go there, look at it, announce that you are standing in front of a cottage, and move on with your life. You could swim in the lake water, but why?<\/p>\n
\nIf you don\u2019t consume a meal on a patio, you have betrayed yourself and also most of the season. Don\u2019t like insects? That\u2019s not my problem, you can speak directly to the earth. Summer isn\u2019t complete until you compete with flying creatures for your meal and the garnish on your fruity cocktail. Summer hasn\u2019t begun<\/em>until you realize the hot breeze has somehow cooled your pasta down to the point of you wondering if it\u2019s been sitting out too long, maybe, and are you going to get sick from this warmish cream sauce. (Spoiler alert: maybe!)<\/p>\n
\nIt\u2019s not summer until you hate it in a way you didn\u2019t think possible. It\u2019s not August until you curse humidity and begin romanticizing the winter even though you know it\u2019s a million times worse. It\u2019s not the best season of all until you tell anybody who will listen about what a garbage month August is and how you can\u2019t wait for October, despite it sometimes being just as hot because the world is melting. And it\u2019s not the ultimate month until you admit to yourself, amidst the heat and the haze and the air advisories, that okay, fine, it\u2019s actually quite acceptable, but to say so goes against who you are, so now you finally have a small secret. So you pour yourself more pink lemonade and accept your fate as somebody who, next year, might order Tevas.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"